https://bit.ly/3ph3vE3
https://bit.ly/3d4YtEZ
https://bit.ly/3xGDrpF
https://bit.ly/3obHZkz
https://bit.ly/3G3ZXeT
https://bit.ly/3EeJTGS
https://bit.ly/3EedtfA
https://bit.ly/3G5COcc
https://bit.ly/31bXvV9
https://bit.ly/3EfKCr4
https://bit.ly/3Dc10rt
https://bit.ly/3lqTOlc
https://bit.ly/3EcVnud
https://bit.ly/3Iarmhd
https://bit.ly/2ZGwJ6k
https://bit.ly/3Daougr
Me: “And limes! Don’t forget the limes!”
He can drink his shitty Bud Light and lime in a can if he wants to, but don’t come crying when you see me drinking real Mexican beer with real Mexican limes, brought to me by real Mexicans. What’s that? The Brown Guy isn’t Mexican? Well, tonight he is, goddammit.
The Drunken Russian arrives. He’s wearing new Converse shoes and a white shirt with a hood…
Me: “Dude, you look like you’re in the KKK.”
Everyone starts laughing. And then I put his hood over his head…
Me: “White Power!”
I just can’t help it…
Me: “What’re you suppose to be, the Grand Dragon, Grand Wizard, or whatever the hell the leaders of the KKK are called!?”
We go outside, and I see someone trying to squeeze in near my shitty sports car with the duck tape holding it together. Screaming at the top of my lungs…
Me: “DON’T HIT THE FUCKING LEXUS!!!”
They immediately stop at an angle as they’re trying to back in…
Me: “I SAID DON’T HIT THE FUCKING LEXUS!!!!!”
They then drive off, and then I throw The Drunken Russian’s hood over his head again…
Me: “WHITE POWER!!!”
Ands he spits his beer all over the porch in laughter. And that’s about all of the comedy that you’re going to get out of me tonight, as I am completely burned out and tired from the night before.
